Comments on: [Insert leg-related pun here]

By: Katie

Katie — Sat, 02 Jun 2007 18:55:50 +0000

I am regularly asked if I have prosthetic legs. I don’t.

As my best friend has pointed out, if I do have artifical limbs, they must be the shittest artificial limbs in the world.

By: Miles Away

Miles Away — Sat, 02 Jun 2007 00:32:01 +0000

eep. i was sure i’d put some perhaps witty quip here although it might have got lost in time and spades. can’t remember for the life of me what t’was.

pointless comment. although perhaps the less talk of loose screws the better.

By: An Unreliable Witness

An Unreliable Witness — Fri, 01 Jun 2007 19:19:49 +0000

An Unreliable Witness wishes to apologise for not responding to any of the lovely comments added above, even though he does not need to apologise for such an oversight. Er.

By: Lester

Lester — Fri, 01 Jun 2007 15:36:09 +0000

‘apathetic’? Balletically speaking (not easy on one leg) that’s bathetic, given the sublimity of the original post. No? OK, maybe not: we all make the occasional boob. BTW, greatly enjoyed the ‘I’ll get my coat’ coda. Funnily enough I was thinking of that recently…

By: Timmargh

Timmargh — Fri, 01 Jun 2007 10:18:26 +0000

I always aspire to having prophetic limbs as mine are merely apathetic …

Sorry, that’s the best I could come up with — I’ll get my coat.

By: the lamb

the lamb — Thu, 31 May 2007 13:22:05 +0000

MRW — so looks like you found your stash. And like, I came with needles a-sharing … plus the druggie lingo and everyfing …

now what?

By: Miss T

Miss T — Thu, 31 May 2007 12:11:16 +0000

Oh bollocks.

“Should”.

Obviously.

By: Miss T

Miss T — Thu, 31 May 2007 12:10:54 +0000

Maybe you shoudl consider a paralytic limb (or limbs).

What a stupid, like, woman.

By: annie

annie — Thu, 31 May 2007 10:37:14 +0000

Spike Milligan wrote a wonderful little poem called ‘The Leg’.

Lurch might enjoy it.

By: An Unreliable Witness

An Unreliable Witness — Thu, 31 May 2007 08:02:05 +0000

Sea Urchin - For an explanation of the confusing in-joke, please see the comments for this post, which related to this earlier entry.

By: Meesha

Meesha — Thu, 31 May 2007 03:38:50 +0000

You should get a gold star for not kicking her in the shins with your prophetic limb.

By: la fille

la fille — Thu, 31 May 2007 02:09:36 +0000

Oh wow… a prophetic limb? You are so lucky. Mine are all just pathetic. They seem to know nothing.

By: andre

andre — Wed, 30 May 2007 23:33:30 +0000

we shall have to find a way of attaching the machine gun to it — then you can smile, politely, then blow one of their toes off.

By: Gordon

Gordon — Wed, 30 May 2007 22:51:25 +0000

You should, like, be nicer, you know. I mean other people are just, you know, trying to relate, sympathise, you know, they don’t, like, try and annoy, you know??

Right?

By: Nicola Valentine

Nicola Valentine — Wed, 30 May 2007 22:20:22 +0000

I love that, a prophetic limb. My granny could always feel things in her water, but having a leg that did it would be so much better.

Thanks for making me laugh tonight with just the right details rendered in just the right way. You are an evil genie-arse :)

By: Sea Urchin

Sea Urchin — Wed, 30 May 2007 21:29:12 +0000

Or you can get one that makes a lot of noise so people make way for you without have to repeat the ever repetitive “excuse me, excuse me, excuse me” to get through. The added attraction is that you will get everyones attention where ever you go. Though it makes it hard to steal, tip toe or spy.

By: asta

asta — Wed, 30 May 2007 21:05:52 +0000

If you do get a prophetic limb make sure you don’t get stuck with one of the older models that can only repeat ” The End is Nigh” all day long. They’re annoying.

By: clarissa

clarissa — Wed, 30 May 2007 20:38:40 +0000

Oh, my. I’m on the wrong blog. I thought this was the nation’s premier leglessblog.

By: Sea Urchin

Sea Urchin — Wed, 30 May 2007 19:59:17 +0000

i’m afraid passive aggressiveness can only be used towards people who comprehend its subtleness. It’s a waste on the rest population…who are spoon fed by tv/hollywood/media.

I must say this line is priceless:
this particular female acquaintance (whose name I still don’t remember) is seemingly suffering from the disastrous speech-related after-effects of having shoved her dentures somewhat clumsily into her mouth earlier that morning.

what is this lurch business and the goose thing? Badges? What next the cheshire cat? Anyone want to throw me a clue…? a map?

By: Peach

Peach — Wed, 30 May 2007 19:37:15 +0000

if it was prophetic of course it would have told you not to go down that corridor in the first place…

… or at least what her name was so you could punctuate your sentences to her with it, like commas, in that withering way bank call centres do when they tell you that sadly… there are insufficient funds, miss peach…

I certainly get that passive aggressive vibe then, and I don’t seem to suffer fools as graciously as you…