Animal Fables: Squirrel

Once upon a time, there lived a squirrel called Cynthia.

Cynthia was the most generous squirrel you could ever wish to meet. Indeed, she was generous to a fault, and in her case it was a very big fault.

Like any squirrel, most of her day was spent scurrying around the forest foraging for nuts. She was quite the best forager around, a fact to which every other squirrel would jealously attest. They really didn’t need to be quite so jealous, however, because all they needed to do was ask for a nut, and she would hand it over.

Oh, I’m so very hungry. That looks like a wonderfully tasty nut you’ve got there, Cynthia. Can I have it? Please?”

The scene that followed invariably played itself out in exactly the same way, time and time again. Cynthia would glance down at the nut she was clutching between her front paws, the nut she had often spent most of the morning arduously carrying from the far end of the forest back to her drey, and then - with only the briefest hint of sorrow crossing her face, just enough to cause a flicker of guilt in whoever was asking for that prized possesion - she would pass it to her fellow squirrel with a beatific smile.

Of course, squirrels are always looking for a quick and painless way to build up their secret larder in preparation for meaner months, and so throughout the forest it became an easy, though entirely lazy option to simply flutter one’s eyelashes, praise the lusciousness of Cynthia’s latest nutty acquisition, and watch as she surrendered it gladly and without so much as a word of complaint.

Cynthia’s best friend, however, was puzzled and concerned by such generous behaviour, and told her as much. “Cynthia,” she said, “I’m puzzled and concerned.”

By what?” asked Cynthia.

By your generous behaviour, of course. Why do you give away all of your nuts? You’re a fabulous forager, and you should be keeping them for yourself, or at least selling them to the other squirrels in exchange for seeds or berries or …” Cynthia’s friend paused and absentmindedly licked her lips “… those crusts of pizza that the humans discard whilst walking through the forest.”

Cynthia blinked, wide-eyed, at her friend. She pondered for a moment, then silently walked to the rear of the drey, placed a paw gently on the doorknob of a cupboard and slowly, slowly pulled it open.

The tiny drey shook with a low, ominous rumble. Then suddenly a torrent, a cascade, a veritable landslide of nuts came pouring out. Thousands upon thousands of them. More nuts than any squirrel could dream of, even in their wildest fantasies. The clattering sound they made as they fell to the floor was deafening.

When the noise finally ceased, Cynthia couldn’t be seen anywhere. She had seemingly been engulfed by the nutty avalanche. Eventually, however, there was movement from underneath the debris, and she appeared, popping her head above the surface then clambering on to the piles of nuts that now covered the entire floor.

You see,” said Cynthia, as she sucked in a breath and regained her composure, “there’s really no sacrifice in being so very generous with the odd nut or two when you’re far and away the best at what you do.”

The End.

See also: the original Animal Fables series.

Comments: 24

    what a glorious tale! perhaps there is something to be learned from Cynthia and her nut-hoarding ways…

    Miles Away | 07.25.07, 01:06

    Yes, we need more Cynthias in the world.

    [I love a talking squirrel, me.]

    Ani | 07.25.07, 09:42

    Miles Away - I agree, though I really have no comment to make on the subject of nut-hoarding. I am really not going to go there.

    Ani - Talking squirrels are quite my favourite animal. If only more of them would stop for a chat occasionally.

    Cheerful One - Aaah.

    An Unreliable Witness | 07.25.07, 10:32

    wait, are you Cynthia here and your posts the nuts? Or are you the nut and we are the squirrel hoarding you? Or even, you are the forest and we are the pizza bits?

    I don’t get it

    Love, Anon (I’m still irritated by that Anon earlier)

    Anonymous Commenters Suck | 07.25.07, 14:53

    Now I just need to figure out how to forage nuts.

    clarissa | 07.25.07, 22:17

    I love your Animal Fables! They are the best!

    desiree | 07.25.07, 22:25

    *quietly pilfering desiree’s nuts*

    secret squirrel | 07.26.07, 00:54

    You may believe you are “really not going to go there”, Mr. Witness, but I have my doubts. I think your Cynthia is lovely, and so are your nuts. Resist that. Ha.

    Seriously, three cheers for Cynthia. We should all be so good at what we do that we can afford that kind of generosity.

    bohémienne | 07.26.07, 04:59

    Anonymous Commenters Suck - You don’t get it? I bleedin’ well don’t get it either!

    Cheerful One - Oui.

    Clarissa - Nut foraging is an art, so I’ve been told.

    Desiree - Thank you.

    OE - Welcome back. Yes, every nut here is a story. There are also a lot of nuts. Though I think I may be talking at cross purposes with myself.

    Secret Squirrel - Don’t be naughty. No pilfering here.

    Bohémienne - Cynthia is exceptionally generous with her nuts. That is all I wish to say on the matter.

    An Unreliable Witness | 07.26.07, 06:54

    Okay, I had to look up the word “pilfering.” Thanks for making me feel dumb, secret squirrel.

    Also, Mr. Witness said it quite right.SHAME ON YOU. SHAME!!!

    desiree | 07.26.07, 09:13

    I’m sure everyone will be delighted to know that I have resolved never to mention nuts again - ever again - on this site. They are nothing but trouble.

    An Unreliable Witness | 07.26.07, 10:57

    Your writing benefits from discipline. This fable was lovely. The words were vivid, precise, but restrained. In some of your other pieces, you lose your discipline and become indulgent, lush in your writing, verging on purple.

    Nut | 07.26.07, 12:01

    *checks self for colour of fur*

    *suddenly wonders if there are places for such animals on such a site if they are to indulge in such vivid colour*

    *gathers discarded nuts*

    *squirrels away*

    a purple squirrel | 07.26.07, 12:38

    but! but! but! nut! no! the lushness and indulgence and purplitude is what i come here for!

    squirrel nutkins | 07.26.07, 12:39

    Honestly. You’re all nuts. And, Mr. Witness, your blog has clearly become a haven for insanely coloured squirrels. Well done. Unique.

    bohémienne | 07.26.07, 12:44

    I saw an albino squirrel once. I was too young to know what it was.

    overnighteditor | 07.26.07, 23:08

    I do love these animal fables.

    andre | 07.27.07, 00:05

    Lovely series, really enjoying these fables.

    Rob | 07.27.07, 05:15

    Andre - ‘Once upon a time, there lived a sheep called Andrew …’ Well, you’ve got to admit it’s got a certain ring to it.

    Rob - The series is, to say the least, a little intermittent. But thank you for your comment, and welcome.

    An Unreliable Witness | 07.27.07, 08:10

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