Random acts of stationery #25

Tabitha? Is that you, dear?

Well, I’m certainly not kissing you now, fish breath.

4. Retrieve dead cat
5. Light barbecue…

Jack - Tabitha is dead! Dead, I tell you!

Ani - But it’s not fish flavour Whiskas! It’s Chicken & Eabbit!

Miles Away - Good idea. I like summer days with the smell of barbecued dead cat wafting from a neighbouring garden.

(I know, I know. First killing a horse, now murdering a cat. I’m nice, really.)

4. Brush teeth vigorously.

If you hadn’t eaten the Whiskas and cancelled the milk, perhaps you wouldn’t have number one to do.

So here is a turn away from being frivolous then, I dare say?

And, oh, might I take this opportunity to commend your handwriting! :)

Do bury the cat. Don’t drop it down a well. Remember you need to sit there sometimes.

I hope you were nice to Tabitha…. Or it will be pet cemetary all over again!

Oh yes. I forgot the connotations attached with those felines and 9 (?) lives. Do bury her properly. Or else… …well…

Tabitha is finally at peace. x

Damn, did you already eat the Whiskas? I’ve run out, and I don’t want to have to kill my cat which I may have to do quite soon if he doesn’t stop going on about how he’s starving to death NOW!

Perhaps you should consider giving her a little to take to ‘the other side’ because in cat heaven (or hell) there may not be such luxuries as milk and whiskas.

Just a thought.

Whiskas. It was never a very original name for a cat.