Archive for May, 2008

I do this

I do this to I do this too I do this x2 I do this to scrub out my insides I do this to spew up my guts I do this to erase the ques­tion mark I do this to rub out the rub out rub out the rub out I do this to cre­ate the […]

Everything is just utter, utter …

Though I never ‘talk non­sense’, of course. Nor have I ever been known to ‘act in a trivial or inef­fect­ive way’. Well, only very occasionally.

Random acts of stationery #37

Words of little consequence #10

Unphotographable

I am an imper­fect pho­to­grapher. Impre­cise and imprac­tical. Unprac­tised and ama­teur. The frame that I form between my out­stretched fin­gers is incon­sist­ent, unevenly shaped, plain wrong. My astyg­matic eyes fre­quently fail as a pin-sharp view­finder. My nervous bal­ance and lack of poise turn the focused to fuzzy. I prefer a statue to a liv­ing and breathing […]

Words of little consequence #9

Words of little consequence #8

Words of little consequence #7

Words of little consequence #6

This isn’t a comedy quiz show, is it?

“Well, I — I — I — I, gosh, Mayor. I’m the mayor. The mayor of Lon­don. Like Dick Whit­ting­ton. How abso­lutely. Yes. Lon­don. Great city. Cradle of — of — of — of — some­thing great. Not sure what. But great, non­ethe­less. Mod­ern demo­cracy and, erm, civil­isa­tion. Or was that Rome? Italian res­taur­ant. Yum, […]

Sad, pathetic charity case

Ladies and gen­tle­men, I want to intro­duce you to Stephen. Stephen is a piti­ful young man who is suf­fer­ing. I’m sure you can tell that, just by look­ing at his pho­to­graph on the right. He is suf­fer­ing from a ter­rible afflic­tion, with which he is afflic­ted twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, three […]