Rethink, return and restart

Blog­ging, then. They — who­ever ‘they’ might be — say it’s dead. They say that no one reads blogs any­more unless they’re writ­ten by news­pa­pers, magazines, per­son­al­ity colum­nists or groups with a par­tic­u­lar niche interest. The art of indi­vidual writ­ten expres­sion has moved to the 140 char­ac­ters of Twit­ter, to the Farmville-playing inan­ity of Face­book, or to Myspace (okay, not Myspace). Why? Because we are so brain-dead that we no longer have the neces­sary atten­tion span to read more than … oh look, KITTENS! Kit­tens play­ing with a ball of wool! Kit­tens chas­ing their tails round and round! Laugh­ing kit­tens! Yay, kit­tens! I love kit­tens! Oh. Oh, sorry. Yes. Sorry. Blogging.

Any­way, I’m here to say that I think this widely held belief is rub­bish. Utter rub­bish. You thought this site was dead, but I’ve brought it back to life for this pur­pose: to prove to you that per­sonal blog­ging is still the future of the inter­net. I am announ­cing, here and now, the end of this humble blog’s slide into barely-updated tor­por. Enough.

Ladies and gen­tle­men, this is the news. I’m return­ing to full-time blog­ging. An Unre­li­able Wit­ness will now fea­ture daily posts, pos­sibly even mul­tiple daily posts sub­mit­ted on the hour, every hour, con­cern­ing everything I am think­ing and doing. And I mean everything. No stone will be left unturned. No embar­rass­ing rev­el­a­tion will be left unspoken. No dis­gust­ing per­sonal habit will be left unex­plored. No corner of my life will remain private to you, my avidly inquis­it­ive readers.

This is it. This is the future of the web. In the words of Prince before he became a squiggle and a nut­case, let’s party like it’s 1999. In the words of, erm, an equally fam­ous blog­ger, let’s blog like it’s 2004. I’m exhil­ar­ated. Aren’t you exhil­ar­ated? I am. I’m so exhil­ar­ated I may spon­tan­eously com­bust. I’m so excited, I just can’t hide it, I’m about to lose con­trol and I think I like it.

Standby for action, every­one. This brave though pos­sibly fool­hardy exper­i­ment starts tomor­row. Click here for more details on how it will work.