Archive for the Holes in time category

This time of night

Even the never-ending swish and rumble of the road out­side is at least dulled. My mind is sud­denly awake with the ques­tions I haven’t asked myself for a fort­night or so. (Not) sleep­ing on my right side, because I don’t want to look to my left. And I’m big enough, old enough and ugly enough to admit […]

Message #251

Don’t be shy. You know you don’t want to be. Come for­ward. Say what you’re think­ing. Feel what you’re say­ing. Think who you’re touch­ing. Be inside and out. Listen. I’m listen­ing. It makes a change.

Meaningless exhalation

I know who you are. No, of course I don’t know who you are. I don’t know your name. This puzzles me. That puzzles me. I’m tired of puzz­ling myself. You puzzle me. That’s good. I need men­tal stim­u­la­tion. Crave it. Men­tal input. Avoid pre­ma­ture brain death. I need touch stim­u­la­tion. Crave it. Touch input. […]

This is and this is not

I’m try­ing to leave myself a trail of bread­crumbs so I can hope­fully find my way back from wherever I am now. I’m not entirely sure. If this exists.

Three times removed

Find­ing myself sur­roun­ded by index cards con­tain­ing intric­ate data, pock­marked for pos­ter­ity, scratch­ings of mean­ing­less fig­ures totalling a sum I can’t even com­pute, and end­less screeds of inform­a­tion doused in the mois­ture from both lov­ing and unlov­ing sighs, I begin the task of burn­ing the evid­ence they reveal. One hun­dred and twenty index cards every […]

Words is an anagram of Sword

But a sword can cut off your face, whereas words can only be tat­tooed onto it. A sword can be plunged into a stone for a nas­cent king to remove. Words can be writ­ten on the stone to warn the king that what he is doing is impossible to mere flesh, and there­fore he should […]

Bus, taxi, car, pedestrian

In a bid to resus­cit­ate my pathetic, dwind­ling cre­ativ­ity — or rather, repeatedly kick its body in the stom­ach as it lies on the floor, plead­ing for mercy — I am attempt­ing to dis­cover whether, via the mir­acle of sleek ‘n’ sexy mobile tech­no­logy, I can write some­thing elo­quent and pro­found whilst ‘on fhe move’, […]

Somewhere, late afternoon, before sunset

Syn­chron­ise watches. Just nod if you’re syn­chron­ised. Okay. Good. So. I think we could be there by mid­night, if we leave now. I really want to be there by mid­night. Mid­night, there or there­abouts. Depend­ing on where we end up. Yes, I like drain­ing my last drink dry come the witch­ing hour, then fall­ing into […]

Seven fifty-four six degrees cloudy

Stop right there. Stop whilst I can feel the creep­ing tendrils of new life in my fin­gers, the work­ing week’s first sur­ging and rip­pling in my whitened knuckles. I stop myself. I always do, always. I have to stop myself. I can­not be any other way. If I exist for only one reason, it is […]

One longer later

Are you still with me? You’re still with me, right? I’ll be keep­ing you in mind — always in mind — as I take your gift and all the pieces of the per­son it con­tains. Grate­ful, that’s me. Grate­ful, for always and for everything. I’ll pull the anonym­ous pack­age from the tooth­less but black-brushed jaws […]

Six forty-eight sixteen degrees sunny intervals

I just went to see if the pair of coo­ing, love­sick pigeons who have been rent­ing space on my bal­cony were up with the lark. As I am. When did I start envy­ing birds that so many con­sider to be little more than trouble­some ver­min, riddled with dis­ease and pes­ti­lence? I just went to see […]

Seven seventeen fourteen degrees overcast

Don’t tell me that I don’t know what I’m doing. I know pre­cisely what I’m doing. I am grabbing the moment, seiz­ing it with both hands, twist­ing and strangling it until it lies limp, cold and unmov­ing in my arms. These few words are the delib­er­ate, con­scious act of tak­ing an inward breath, whilst I hold […]

First day, last day, every day

Okay. So you wake up. You wake up, you yawn, you scratch your­self. You peel sleep crys­tals from the corners of your eyes. You check that your body is gen­er­ally intact, as you left it the night before, before it was tossed this way and that in dream­time or night­mare hours. You run your fingers […]

Cannot locate signal

I went look­ing for the cracked, faded and dis­tant voice that I knew lurked some­where in the jagged land­scape, hid­den unheard between dis­tor­ted peaks and hushed val­leys. I held the sleek, elec­tronic sea­shell to my ear, and behind the tem­pes­tu­ous waves I could hear the faint prom­ise of a silent sea of sound, stretch­ing as […]

Melodrama in nineteen syllables