The future’s so bright, I gotta wear shades

The sum­mer of 1989 isn’t neces­sar­ily a favour­ite one, but it will always be mem­or­able. It was the sum­mer of A-levels, filled with revi­sion, exams, the post-exam high, the anti­cip­a­tion of wait­ing for res­ults, and the pre­par­a­tion for (hope­fully) going off to uni­ver­sity. How­ever, even before I sat my final exam, I’d vir­tu­ally decided to reject all my uni­ver­sity offers for sub­jects like Eng­lish, Com­mu­nic­a­tion Stud­ies and Media Stud­ies, in order to apply again to study Drama; so I knew that I wouldn’t be going off to the won­der­ful world of higher edu­ca­tion for another year. Yet I also knew that a move to the bright lights and big city of Lon­don was on the cards — so my anti­cip­a­tion lay in the fact that I would finally be get­ting out of the rural back­wa­ters of Somer­set after 18 years.

I had a job in a newsagents/video shop that sum­mer — the high­light of which was the local vicar reg­u­larly buy­ing the Sunday Sport, which he care­fully fol­ded inside his copy of the Sunday Times — but it didn’t take up much (or pos­sibly enough) of my time. There were lots of nights in the pub — “Yes, bar­man! We’re 18! We’ll have the finest Per­nod & Black you have!” And there were some pretty good house parties too, includ­ing one at my house while the rest of the fam­ily were away. Some thought­ful per­son — whom I’d never met before, nat­ur­ally — bought some fuzzily-recorded hard­core porn video, which meant that most of the guys present locked them­selves in the living-room and weren’t seen for the rest of the even­ing. I never saw the video in ques­tion, since myself and four friends had broken into my neighbour’s garden (they were away on hol­i­day too, for­tu­nately) to paddle in their small foun­tain and stare up at the moon. I still remem­ber that it was one of the most beau­ti­ful moons ever, and it inspired us to talk at some length about the future, our futures — about get­ting away from this dead-end town, being suc­cess­ful, and never com­ing back. Need­less to say, we were pissed on cheap wine and slightly stoned. Truly, the inno­cence of youth. I never did find out whether any of those people ever returned to our home town, or whether they “made it.”

Mean­while, the day­light hours were spent mak­ing a film. Using a cheap video cam­era belong­ing to a mate, myself and my two closest friends — two of that often-mentioned short list of people with whom I’d love to re-establish con­tact one day — made a joke tour­ist guide to our home town. We were just out of Sixth Form, so the com­edy was prob­ably not that comic or soph­ist­ic­ated, but I do remem­ber that everything we said in our attempts at humor­ous com­ment­ary was filled with the frus­tra­tion and dis­ap­point­ment of small town life. We would film ourselves in front of local land­marks — the main church, the mar­ket square, the excuse for a local foot­ball club, our old primary school — and come up with an impro­vised script which abso­lutely ripped shreds out of the whole place.

I would dread see­ing this film today, but I sus­pect that — even now — it would be impossible not to see the obvi­ous desire to escape pic­tured in all our faces. Of the three of us — well, when I first moved to Lon­don I was full of big ideas about going back for reg­u­lar vis­its. I never have, although I am begin­ning to think that a brief skulk round old haunts might be in order in the near future. The other two of this ter­rible trio — with our ideas about being arty and mak­ing films — ended up going to the same uni­ver­sity in Lon­don, mov­ing up to the smoke just a month before I did. I sus­pect that one prob­ably took to city life and is now a ded­ic­ated res­id­ent of leafy North Lon­don; but I have my sus­pi­cions that the other may have found the lure of the fields and coun­try pubs a bit too much in the long run.

The sum­mer months after exams and before uni­ver­sity are always going to be a strange time. Too much hanging around, wait­ing for things to hap­pen. How­ever, it’s a time that every­one should cher­ish. In many cases, you’re say­ing good­bye to an old life. You want to embrace the future — but instead you just take its hand in yours, and fol­low nervously where it leads.

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