Archives
Here you will find links to every entry published on An Unreliable Witness: Preserving. It’s not a complete five years’ worth, because as outlined here, only selected posts were transferred from the cobwebbed archives.
Should you wish to read the entirety at one sitting - as some brave souls have tried in the past - I would humbly suggest that you seek immdiate psychiatric attention, since there is an incredible amount of inane and impenetrable verbosity contained within these pages. Idly browsing just a few selected posts, however, can prove to be an entertaining way to pass a dull weekend afternoon, especially if you’re laid up with the dreaded lurgy, go into a cold sweat if you step away from the computer for more than fifteen minutes, or have no social life.
2007: Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec
2005: Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec
2004: Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec
2003: Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec
2002: Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec
2001: Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec
2000: Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec
January 2007
October 2005
- Non-recumbent
- Headache
- Revenge: a serving suggestion
- How fucking romantic
- Five years
- Yellow squares in front of my eyes
- Time trial
- “I liked you when you were better”
- Open all hours
September 2005
August 2005
July 2005
June 2005
- Flunking the therapy A-level
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #12
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #11
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #10
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #9
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #8
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #7
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #6
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #5
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #4
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #3
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #2
- Essential Lifestyle Tip #1
- Raindrops keep falling in my bathroom
May 2005
- Revenge of the Sith: a critical appreciation
- Turn on, tune in, opt out
- I’ll never last the night
- Uncharacteristic review
April 2005
March 2005
February 2005
- Excerpt #1976
- Not mine to sell
- The age of the e-spoilsports
- Excerpt #1977
- Excerpt #1978
- Excerpt #1979
- Excerpt #1980
- Excerpt #1981
- Excerpt #1982
- Excerpt #1983
- Excerpt #1984
- Excerpt #1985
- Excerpt #1986
- Excerpt #1987
- Excerpt #1988
- Excerpt #1989
- Excerpt #1990
- Excerpt #1991
- Excerpt #1992
- Excerpt #1993
- Excerpt #1994
January 2005
- Excerpt #1995
- Excerpt #1996
- Excerpt #1997
- Excerpt #1998
- Excerpt #1999
- Excerpt #2000
- Excerpt #2001
- Excerpt #2002
- Excerpt #2003
- Excerpt #2004
- Excerpt #2005
- Talking arts with tube travellers
- Putting a spoke in the bandwagon’s wheels
- hppy nu yr :-)
December 2004
November 2004
October 2004
- Just so blah blah blah
- Neighbourly concern
- “Sarf of the river? Wiv a secret dossier, y’say?”
- Dial-a-Guru
September 2004
- So much for sloganeering
- Obsession (not by Calvin Klein)
- Itemise
- The adult who never grew up
- A bloody farce
- A refresher course in socialising
- Interplanetary teatray
- Talking shop
August 2004
- I had a bottle of Pinot Grigio
- Modern thoughts about beautiful days
- Personal clippings
- Hell is other people’s bullet points
- Cursing under every breath
- The inevitability of inevitable change
- No flowers, by request
July 2004
June 2004
May 2004
- Not only awake, but delusional too!
- Don’t forget to …
- What happens if I gaze upwards?
- Hazily, now
- I spy with my little browser
- Splurge
April 2004
- Poking around in a blogger’s dusty attic
- If you see Dave, tell him
- Coiffure calamity
- How Gwyneth Paltrow ate London
- Was that the web that was?
March 2004
- Top of the class
- The trees! The sky! Er, the motorway?
- Things we said today (and previously)
- She’s in the queue, apparently
- “It’s all going to be OK”
February 2004
- I still haven’t come to any conclusions
- Status report: 1.34am
- Speaking my language
- The return of the ’80s playboys
- Compliment slip-up
- Swings, roundabouts and missile launchers
- Inbox insight
January 2004
- Somewhere, a song plays
- Don’t use that tone of voice with me
- No sleep ’til teatime
- Sweeping statements of a domestic goddess
- Even princesses are mortal
- Oh three, oh four
December 2003
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 12
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 11
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 10
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 9
- Learning not to depend
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 8
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 7
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 6
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 5
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 4
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 3
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 2
- The Twelve Days of Christmas: 1
- City sickness
- Short story VI
- Short story V
November 2003
- Short story IV
- Short story III
- Short story II
- Short story
- Please put down your pens
- Spoken like a true android
- Different sounds for different times
October 2003
- Act one, scene one
- Get your bloody clowns off my streets
- One hundred lines on the subject
- Ideal home exposition
September 2003
August 2003
July 2003
- Soundwaves
- Oh, behave
- It’s the final countdown
- Recall #2
- Essential Lifestyle Tip
- Messages to nobody in particular
- Doorknobs and letterboxes
- Knick-Knacks Anonymous
June 2003
- Reveal thyself
- Being insulted by British Gas
- Anger management?
- Think bad, speak good
- Recall #1
- The modern malaise
- Click click tap click click tap
- You can’t buy common sense
- Regional outlook
May 2003
April 2003
March 2003
- Even a counter-culture needs margarine
- The whelk of human kindness
- I’m in love with a German film star
- Grieg’s Piano Concerto, by Grieg
- The kids are alright
- Falling down gracefully
- Chasing tales
February 2003
January 2003
December 2002
November 2002
October 2002
- Equally cursed and blessed
- Discovered just in passing
- The death of your chosen style
- Wrong way round
- Make a wish?
- We relate, don’t we?
- A roof over all our heads
- It’s been ‘real’, y’know?
September 2002
- Quality, not quantity
- What’s Swedish for ’self-assembly’?
- Can you tell what it is yet?
- A nightingale sang in W5
- New phrases for our language
- Do as I say, not as I do
- Consequences #27 - Me
- Consequences #26 - Mariah
- Consequences #25 - Stuart
August 2002
- Consequences #24 - Fez
- Consequences #23 - Lilith
- Consequences #22 - Ann
- Consequences #21 - Emma
- Consequences #20 - D
- Consequences #19 - Mike
- Consequences #18 - Tom
- Consequences #17 - Amy
- Consequences #16 - Bobbie
- Consequences #15 — Barbara
- Consequences #14 - Gert
- Consequences #13 - Rodney
- Consequences # 12 - Adrian
- Consequences #11 - Anna
- Consequences #10 - Emma
- Consequences #9 - Graybo
- Consequences #8 - Jessica
- Consequences #7 - Gordon
- Consequences #6 - Vicky
- Consequences #5 - Tom
- Consequences #4 - Caroline
- Consequences #3 - Stuart
- Consequences #2 - Meg
- Consequences #1 - Me
- A boxed and labelled life
- Tbat’ll be me …
- The antiseptic corridors of perception
- Smile’s OK
July 2002
June 2002
- The magic of childhood
- Establishment’s clown
- Sixteen, clumsy and shy
- Er, um, maybe …
- Metropolitan madness moment
- An uninspiring score draw
May 2002
April 2002
March 2002
- Cold storage
- Two hearts under the skyscrapers
- Social ineptitude in one easy lesson
- Hesitation, repetition, deviation
February 2002
- Judging a book by its cover
- How Oscar went mad
- [Exit stage right for gin and tonic]
- Tucking in the corners
- Big red book
- Out in the country
January 2002
- Are you my character witness?
- When the words stop
- A quick flick through the racks
- Plain bananas
- Just the one teacup, then
- Fax off and die
- Saints, sinners and Saturdays
- One moment amongst many
December 2001
- “Hang on,” she said
- Hardback softback narrow feint spiral-bound
- When will I be famous?
- I don’t care (a progressively deteriorating list)
- More or less
- “It’s the perfect gift idea for the one you love!”
November 2001
- Bolt out of the blue
- When did you last see your name?
- Balls: an incoherent rant
- Disjoint me
- When you hear the air attack warning …
- Settle down, children
- Going solo
- You’re so fucking special
- 9, 72, 211, 220, 283, 295
- Hello little girl
October 2001
- Searching for the mists and mellow fruitfulness
- Me and the man in the Classical Music Exchange
- Times are hard for dreamers
- All animals are equal, but …
- Inner ear
September 2001
- 9/11: a snapshot of the world
- What else is there to say?
- This feels unreal
- Love and the concentric spheres: part 2
- Love and the concentric spheres: part 1
- Notes from a city life: no 2
- Notes from a city life: no 1
- Neighbours, everybody needs good neighbours
- Not bookish, just hedonist
August 2001
- The book to end all books?
- The month that spoke
- Rhetoric for the masses
- Reading between the lines
- This is your Captain speaking
July 2001
- The obligatory “Oh my God, it’s hot” post
- Never look under the bed
- Fame, fame, fatal fame
- Bottle that moment
June 2001
May 2001
April 2001
February 2001
- We could send letters
- Winding roads, yellow lights and a warm blanket
- Be quiet everyone, I’m in a frenzy